One of my biggest fears.

I hesitated writing about this for awhile. I feel so horribly for those who had to endure the fear and pain from what happened with the bridge collapse. And my thoughts go to those who are suffering as a result.

The reason I didn't write about it though, I must admit, was not for those who suffered. It was for myself. Because those events of that day brought up one of my biggest fears which I have been trying to conquer for years.

I fear and loathe driving over big and tall bridges.

Living where I do, and traveling for my work as much as I do, I have to drive over some VERY tall and VERY long bridges quite often. I hate it each and every time. And when traffic causes me to be stopped on them for awhile, I fight the strong urge to jump out of my car and run for the nearest end. I feel every sway and bounce. I'm afraid someone is going to hit me and cause me to go over the side because I don't think the walls are high enough. I make sure my window is open in case I do go in, so I have a chance at getting out. If I'm driving, I refuse to look over the sides. If Mr. Bean is driving, I won't let him look at the view, make him drive in the middle lane and yell at him if he is speeding. It is all encompassing, and I can't breathe until we are over it.

And, now, as a result of this horrific event and the long needed inspection and review of all national bridges showing that similar problems exist all over, I feel my fears are justified. So I'm really scared of the next time having to go over one of these bridges, knowing what I know about what happened. And God forbid if there is a traffic jam. Just writing about this is making my heart beat fast and my breath shallow.

I am truly saddened and sorry for those who suffered from this tragic event. I also wish though, that I never heard about this happening.